I had a client here the other day who broke down sobbing. She wanted to change things in her life. Not unusual. That’s why most people come for a reading.
But the reason she was crying was that she was overwhelmed. Because she wanted to change EVERYTHING. All at once.
At a certain point in our lives, we take a look around and realize that some things aren’t quite what we hoped for. The career we once craved has become boring. The relationship that once made our hearts tingle has become “meh.” Daily life is just about getting through our “to do” list. That quiet dissatisfaction is a sign the Universe wants you to shake things up a little bit.
The thing about change is, we both want it and fear it. There’s something comforting about the familiar and the boring. We know how to “do” it. With our eyes closed. The idea of changing jobs, ending a relationship, moving to a different city, whatever, freaks us out. As much as we know intellectually that our life could be richer and better, our gut clenches up at the thought of shaking up the status quo.
My client was crying because those red lights were going off in her head. She wanted to do too much at once and every stay-put instinct in her was making her wig out. I could see that there were better things lining up for her in the next few months – but she had to take advantage of that energy and move towards them.
We mapped out a plan to prioritize her “change” list. Instead of tackling everything, I looked at the one thing that would have the greatest impact overall.
By getting a better job 1) her financial situation would improve, allowing her to 2) move to a nicer apartment. And 3) because she wouldn’t be stressing over her bills and having to work a second job, she’d have more bandwidth available for a new relationship. See what I did there?
The next thing I had to do was to inspire her to make the moves necessary to make all that good stuff happen. The trick to faking out the Fear of Change response is: itty bitty, teeny weeny steps. So small that your freak-out reflex doesn’t even know its happening.
Take a look at the thing you need or want to change. Break it down into M&M sized pieces. Don’t tackle more than one of them a day. You want to go so slow that the fear never wakes up. No matter how tempted or motivated you are to do more, don’t. I can’t stress this enough: doing more is like poking the bear.
We are meant to do more and be more in this life we’ve been given. We chose to be here in human form. The dissatisfaction you feel is a sign its time to evolve to the next step of your journey. I’m a big believer that, if you make even the smallest effort, the Universe will meet you halfway. For each small step, the Universe makes one towards your goal, too. It’s your co-creator in change. You’ll be there before you know it. Get going.
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