Losing a pet is one of the worst — the WORST — things ever. I’ve had clients cry more over a lost animal friend than the loss of a parent. There’s something about our critters that touches us on a very deep level, and I totally get the emotions. So a big box of Kleenex gets set out along with my crystals as I prepare for the reading. And when I do connect with the spirit of a beloved animal, it is a profound experience. Over the years, this is what I’ve learned about their life on the Other Side.
First off, animals don’t fear death like we do. They understand that its just a transition to another state of being; they get the cycle of nature. It’s no biggie. They may not want to “leave” us, but there’s not so much drama around it. Because they know that they’ll still be around.
I’ve connected with many pets who admit they hung around longer than they wanted to, in order to give their owners time to wrap their brains around the idea of letting them go. They put up with pain or discomfort for the express purpose of buying time for their human. Now that’s love.
Once they cross, they feel wonderful, eager to play and interact with loved ones who’ve also passed. I often see them with a parent, grandparent or child who’s passed, even if they didn’t know that person here on earth. If they’re connected to you, that’s good enough for the critter.
And since animals still care about their people here, they come around us. The pet door between Heaven and Earth swings pretty easily, so they go back and forth. A lot. Our spirit pets patrol the home and the yard, making sure we’re protected. They will jump up on the bed like they used to, or curl up in their favorite corner. So if you think you hear/feel/see them, don’t check your meds: you ARE encountering them again.
Many clients wonder if their lost pet will be upset if they bring a new animal in to the house. I can pretty much tell you “no.” Most animals I connect with want their people to help give another fur-baby a good life, like they did for them. And here’s the thing: their spirit will be there to help the new pet adjust, like warning them about that screaming toddler who used to pull their tail.
Another question I get is, will their animal come back in the form of another pet? Sometimes yes — but like with any grieving process, you need to let them go and not hang on the hope of having them in your life again. Like any human who’s crossed over, your pet has a new life on the other side of the veil. You must give them the freedom to grow in their spiritual evolution. And not for nothing, it’s unfair to a new pet to expect them to behave like the deceased one. Not to mention, weird. Respect the individuality of the animal soul.
One of the most beautiful things I’ve learned is that our pets are all waiting for us to cross over. They knock over our human family members, in their rush to greet us. I cannot wait to be covered in fur and slobbery kisses. I wonder if my dog, Pasha, whom I lost when I went to college, still has the same breath that could melt paint? I’ll report back.
But in the meantime, treasure the magic your pet(s) has brought to your life, know that they still love you and come around, and wait for that wonderful day when you’re all on the same side of the Rainbow Bridge.
BTW, if you have any questions about my pet communication process, hit the website.
I admit it – when it comes to nurseries, garden centers or roadside plant sales, I’m like a crackwhore. My happiest mornings are when, coffee in hand, I can walk up and down the rows at my favorite garden place, picking up a new plant or flat of annuals to brighten up my yard.
Gardening is what I call “dirt therapy.” And it serves an additional purpose, grounding me after spending time in the psychic realm. Many times after a reading, I will get down and dirty – literally – throwing on my work shoes for a quick round of weeding. Putting my hands in the earth balances out the buzzy energy in my head. If I can’t weed, I’ll step outside and just place my hands on the ground.
Working in the psychic realms involves raising your vibration; I always feel a little spacey afterwards. You need to balance that out, because too much time in that place, and you’ll end up like those ladies who talk to themselves in the produce aisle. Or THIS guy…
Even if you’re not psychic, we’re all under a heightened barrage of energy these days, the kind that keeps us in our heads. Texting, email, watching cat videos on YouTube – all the time we spend “connected” does a number on us. Exhibit A: look at any kid at the mall, zombie’d out on their phones. Need I say more?
Anyway, I think that’s one reason we see so much anxiety and depression. Yes, there may be other medical reasons, but when your brain is jumping all over the place, looking for the next bit of stimuli, well, that can’t be good. In fact, I read of a new phenomenon called “popcorn brain.” The name says it all.
Balancing out all that mental energy with something physical is good for you in so many ways – and will keep you psychically healthy. I tell my students that they should do something grounding after reading: play with your dog, go for a walk, eat something, share some hot monkey-love with your honey, or plant up a pot of geraniums. The point is to keep your channel from going all flookey.
Psychic energy has a component of electricity to it. One needs to ground that special brand of electricity or you’ll burn your mental house down. I’ve seen it, especially among people just opening their channel. So be responsible with your instrument. And meet me at the garden center for some dirt therapy.
Got questions about this? Hit my website for more info.
We’re hitting the Memorial Day weekend, and although its become associated with barbecues, beer and that scary moment when you display your winter-white legs in shorts for the first time, it really IS about “memorial” — as in, remembering those who’ve passed on in service to our country.
Whether you’ve lost a military family member — or any family member or friend — I want you to know that they will probably be at that barbecue with you. When someone crosses over, it does not mean that they cease to be involved or aware of life on this side of the veil. To the contrary: they’re still keeping an eye out for us.
To me, crossing over is like graduating from high school. You may be heading to college, but you’re still in touch with those kids a grade or two behind. If those “kids” are family members, you want to keep in the loop, maybe not quite as much as when you were alive — but still.
You’d be surprised at how many times a spirit has let me know that they were at a special birthday or graduation. They know about a new grandchild — or even the new addition you put on the house. The point is, they keep in touch. It’s like they’re checking your Facebook page. So you might want to keep the sketchier “selfies” off of it. Just a suggestion.
Anyway, those who we are deeply linked to, either by blood or circumstance, remain in our karmic phone book. They are busy with new experiences on spirit-side, but they don’t forget us. In fact, they’re closer than we think.
Most of us think that death takes us to a place far, far away; but in reality, they’ve just switched into a higher energy form. They move so fast that we can’t see them. Hey, Star Trek fans. ‘Memba that episode where Kirk is “sped up” by some alien chick? Here’s a refresher:
That’s kind of like how it is for our loved ones on the Other Side. They resonate at a level that we don’t easily experience; dimensionally, they live about three feet off of our ground.
For them to “appear” to us is not easy. They must slow down their vibration, which takes some doing. As a medium, I need to raise mine as they lower theirs — and then we meet somewhere in the middle, energetically speaking. When they show themselves to a non-medium, the process is even harder, so be super-grateful for that gift.
Because the process is tricky is one reason you may not see a loved one soon after their passing. They’re getting used to their new state; its like falling asleep as plain old dumpy you and waking up as Angelina Jolie. Takes some getting used to. That bit of down time is good for us, as it lets us adjust to this life without that person. Not fun, not easy, but necessary for our growth. Wanting to “see” them again is a natural response, but being too desperate and needy isn’t good for them or you.
Grief is a powerful teacher. And understanding that our loved ones continue to live on, albeit in a different form, takes time. Just know that they are as close as your thoughts and memories.
The other night I dreamt I was about to go on stage in front of thousands of people, to play bass with the Stones. Only I don’t know how to play. And unlike flying or breathing underwater, I didn’t know how to do it in the dream, either. Here I was gonna be standing next to Charlie Watts, a frikkin’ awesome drummer and one of my heroes. And I’m clueless. Clue. Less. It still gives me the willies when I recall it.
I know where that particular dream came from: reading an article about the band in Rolling Stone earlier. But there are other dreams that offer up more than just a psychedelic rehash of the day.
Like those wonderful ones where you encounter someone you’ve lost and they look wonderful. They practically shine. And you know – you just know –that they’ve visited you from the Other Side. Or the one where you get a “preview” of something that’s about to happen. This is where dreams serve a really useful purpose, to “download” info from other dimensions. Our conscious brain is in “sleep” mode – literally – so we can access different channels.
You may not think you dream, but you do. It’s a vital physical function; in fact, I think I read somewhere that, when test subjects were prevented from dreaming (as in, being woken up repeatedly), they got really sick. Umm, for the record? I would cut a bitch if someone did that to me. Anyway, the point is you do indeed dream — you just aren’t so hot on remembering them.
Dreaming is where we work stuff out on the physical plane, but more importantly, its where we access higher dimensions. Training yourself to remember what you learn in Dreamland is not as hard as you might think.
First, keep a notebook and pen by your bed. Second, set your intention to start remembering your dreams As you drift off, tell yourself that you WILL recall what you’ve experienced in the dream state. If you wake up in the middle of the night from a dream, jot down what you remember. Do NOT tell yourself that you’ll do it in the morning. Trust me, you probably won’t. So roll over, turn on the light for 10 seconds and scrawl it down. Just like Jerry Seinfeld with his awesome idea for a joke…..which he then couldn’t read.
When you first wake up from a dream, try not to move. This will keep you in that state between the worlds where it will be easier to consciously recall what you’ve experienced. Once you’ve captured a theme, image, whatever jot it in your notebook.
If something really stands out, ask yourself what it means – then go with the first impression or thought that you get. Don’t overthink it. Stay in that muted place where things flow without a lot of intellect behind them. Dreams reach us on a very subtle level; use more of your gut to interpret them, and less your brain.
There are some great dream interpretation books ( I like Mary Summer Rain’s Guide to Dream Symbols) and sites out there, but don’t discount what your own bad self tells you.
Once you’ve built up your recall muscle, you can direct your dreams towards something specific. For example, you can invite a deceased loved one to visit you in the dream state. Don’t force this; they have things going on on the Other Side. They don’t sit around, flipping through Us magazine, waiting for your call. Make the invitation, then let it go. Trying too hard blocks the energy.
You can also ask your Spirit Guides to provide an answer to a question by way of your dreams. Even if you don’t know who your guide(s) is, simply throw up a request for information. You can assign them a name if you want, or just say, “Yo, Guides – I need some help here with (fill in the blank).” They don’t stand on formality. Then see what they send you. And don’t be surprised if the answer/info you get is different than what you expect. Receive it with grace and say “thank you.”
One note – don’t get frustrated if you don’t get anywhere in remembering your dreams. Keep setting the intention, and eventually you will.
There’s an old folk trick to help the dream recall process along. Place a glass of water by your bed. When you first wake up, drink it down to help remember. Or to get the stank morning breath out of your mouth. In the meantime, enjoy a blast from my 80s past. And the exquisite Annie Lennox. In my dreams, I have her voice. In real life, my singing voice is closer to Linda McCartney’s.
I was having breakfast at my local diner yesterday. It’s the kind of place where everyone pretty much knows everyone — and the hostess, “L,” knows I’m an intuitive. So as I worked on a short stack, she sat with me and asked why she’s all of a sudden started seeing the spirits of her dead loved ones.
They’ve been in her kitchen, by her bed at 3 in the morning, even in her car. She’s pretty freaked out, seeing Gramps who died 30 years ago. Yeah, it sounds all cool til its YOUR dead aunt riding shotgun on your way to pick up the dry cleaning. So why is this happening?
Well, L has had a rough couple of years, culminating in some serious surgery a few months back. I suspected her new ability was connected to this time period and she realized that it was. My take on it is that her beloved relatives are letting her know–in no uncertain terms — that they’re supporting her during this phase. Her troubles have made her focus on what’s key in her life, and the rest of the noise has dropped away. I like to think she’s been “cracked open” a little bit, and is now able to physically see who’s always been around her.
Some of you may know from my recent Facebook posts that I was out in Minnesota recently, after my sister entered the hospital. Something similar happened ; the urgency of her illness made me hyper-focused. I wasn’t cluttering my pointed little head with thoughts of cleaning litter boxes or my next deadline. And as I sat in that hospital room, I heard our mother’s voice more than once. Like she was right there (and still telling me to comb my hair off my face).
I think it has something to do with our energy frequency. During a tough moment, our focus is sharpened on the Now. Think about the aftermath of any tragedy, where people describe having seen angels around them, or perhaps deceased loved ones. They’re always there, but because we’re “clear,” we can physically see them, even as they vibrate at higher speeds. These are glimpses into the other dimensions all around us. Beautiful.
Meditation can help to make a space where we can more easily experience these higher-vibration experiences. Know that those we miss are always there, riding shotgun as we go to pick up the drycleaning. And surrounding us with their love.
I’m big on combos: Peanut butter and jelly. Solids and stripes. Jagger and Richards. So it wasn’t a huge leap to combine my psychic ability with my love for critters and become an Animal Communicator.
Learning to tweak the radar to interact with animals has been a profound experience. Besides the unconditional love and humor they share, I’ve been struck by the untamed spirit that each animal brings to a session. Even the most docile housecat is still linked to the wild essence of the Earth. These encounters remind me of the powerful connection between all forms of life.
One of the most important lessons Animal Communication has taught me is to respect their unique place in the universe. We assume that, as humans, we’re superior to those lower down the food chain. Just ‘cause your dog rolls around in goose poop at the park or your cat chases shadows on the wall, do not take this as a sign that they don’t know what’s really going on. Animals demonstrate unconditional love, endless forgiveness, a massive capacity for joy and plenty of loyalty. How many people do you know like that? Didn’t think so.
Respect for an animal is key to communicating with them.
I can’t just start demanding they talk to me. Instead, I need to relax, quiet my ego and wait until they feel comfortable. I mean, imagine if a total stranger came barging into your living room and started trying to get you to reveal details about a personal issue? Oh yeah, that’s Dr. Phil. But if it happened, you’d probably want to run and hide, just like a shy kittycat. So I give the critters some space. And some r-e-s-p-e-c-t.
And when they talk? Their conversations are refreshingly simple, direct, and without all the hoo-ha we humans wrap ourselves in.
My cat Pyewacket frequently tells me to “lighten up” during the day – then does something silly to make me laugh. A horse calmly told me to assure her nervous owner that she fully intended to win a race she was entered in – despite never having won before — then went on to do it (sorry, I won’t be holding court at the OTB anytime soon). A dog who had passed on when her owner was suddenly called into work told me she purposely wanted it that way, because she knew that, if “Mom” had stayed with her, she would have had a much harder time leaving. Letting her owner know that alleviated a huge burden of guilt.
If you’re an animal lover, you’ve most likely had a conversation or two already. You just didn’t consider it as such. Like I said, animals talk very simply and directly. There’s no need for them to really “think it over” –they say what they feel. And the act of receiving intuitive impressions is actually pretty simple – if you’ve ever had a hunch or gut feeling, you’ve experienced it. We just make it more complicated than it really is.
Here are some simple steps to talking to your animal friend(s):
1) Quiet your mind. If you don’t already meditate, learn to do so. You need a “clear palate” to receive any intuitive information. Focus on just breathing, letting random thoughts simply pass by. The goal is to not have a completely blank mind (physically impossible), just one that’s not preoccupied with car pools, grocery lists and work stuff.
2) Approach your animal when they’re relaxed. Sit with them quietly, focusing on your breathing and imagining your energies drawing closer together. Even if they’re not physically close by (like a wild bird or a feral cat), imagine your energies meeting.
3) When you feel relaxed and ready, ask your animal a simple question. The answer may come quickly, as an image, a feeling or a single word. Trust what you get – doubting yourself is the quickest way to shut down the link.
I find that my first impressions are usually the most accurate, and I’ve proven this by logging my “critter conversations” and checking back later. So learn to trust what you’re receiving.
If you find yourself getting frustrated, settle down and breathe again. Learning to trust your instincts takes time and patience, but it’s a skill that will serve you well, not just with animals, but in everyday life.
And when you’re done talking with your furry companion, remember to say “thank you.” Good manners aren’t just for the two-legged types.
Let’s face it: no matter how spiritual you try to be, at some point, you will encounter people who are — to put it bluntly — pains in the ass. They push your buttons, work your last nerve, make you want to punch something. They can be a co-worker, neighbor, boss, family member, client. They are someone you can’t easily get away from. Here’s how they dealt with it on Seinfeld:
Other than “Serenity now!”, there are some practical tricks you can try. Like the Ice Cube method: write your personal PIA’s (pain in the ass) name on a slip of paper. Put it in any small container filled with water and stick it in the freezer. Their ability to interfere, aggravate or otherwise drive you nuts will be sharply curtailed.
This is an old bit of sympathetic magic that doesn’t harm the person, which is very important. According to the laws of nature magic, whatever you put out will come back to you “three times three” — this is why Wiccans include “with harm to none” in their workings. So as much as you’d like to punch them in the snoot, please control yourself and head for the ice tray.
My sister has a boss that would make the Dalai Lama lose his shit. She had tried everything to make their working relationship better, but he continued to belittle, insult and interfere. I told her about the freezing method; she went home and stuck his name in her big downstairs ice chest. Guess what? The next day, he started heading towards her in the hallway, with that look on his face indicating that he was about to deliver his usual morning beatdown- but all of a sudden, she saw him stop dead in his tracks, turn around and go back to his office. Since then, he’s largely stayed out of her hair.
There’s a variation on this technique involving water. If there’s a PIA you need to sit near, say for a meeting or event, put a glass of water between the two of you to block the negativity. I read about a fellow psychic who did outdoor fairs. There was one other reader no one ever wanted to work near; she was a raging PIA and her negative vibes kept customers away. Well, our psychic found herself stuck next to the PIA, and there was nothing she could do about it. So she poured a cup of water and set it between their tables. Guess what? She got more business than any one who’d ever been placed in that slot before.
If you have a really irritating neighbor, put water in mason jars and dot a few along your property line. If you live in an apartment, put it against a common wall. Just make sure to dump the water down a sewer drain and NOT in your home’s system. Don’t want that janky vibe coming back into your domain.
Crystals are another helpful tool to block the aggravation of a PIA. Wearing them or keeping a chunk in whatever space they may show up in works. Rose quartz has a gentle, loving vibe that will increase your understanding of why a person is being so obnoxious.
If you need to up the protective wattage, black obsidian will absorb the bad juju coming off that person. One of my friends who read in bars –not something I recommend — used to keep a giant piece of black obsidian in her bra to protect her heart chakra. Kinda made her look like she had a third breast, but it did the trick.
For that matter, wearing something black will also have a shielding effect.
These are all stopgap measures. Over the long term, consider that when someone in your life is rubbing your fur backwards, they’re giving you a chance to learn something — if its only to learn creative ways to swear silently. “Serenity now!”
I’m a big believer that everyone – EVERYONE — is psychic. Whether it’s a hunch, first impression or gut feeling, intuition is hardwired into our system. It was a survival skill back in the day – and can still save you from a whole lot of aggravation, if you only trust it more. Admit it: there’s been at least one instance in your life where you “knew” something, right? Did you blow it off at the time? Many of us do, but I’m here to tell you that learning how to pay attention to those little “pings” is going to change everything.
So what distinguishes a professional psychic like me from plain old you? Not much, actually. I compare it to a radio: some people are born with their intuition “channel” locked in and turned waaaaay up. Others have to fiddle with the knobs a little to pick up what’s out there in the ether. But it’s totally do-able. Like anything, it just takes practice.
There are three basic ways psychic information shows up:
Clairvoyance: “clear seeing.” This is when you see images in your mind’s eye. There are some psychics who see things for real – but most of us see it in our head. I may see images of people involved in a person’s job, or a geographical place if I sense a move.
Clairaudience: “clear hearing.” This is “hearing” sounds, voices, words in your mind’s ear.
Clairsentience: “clear feeling.” You feel physical sensations, smell things – anything that engages your senses. For instance, I may feel a heaviness in my chest when I’m picking up someone who passed from lung or heart issues.
Very often, a psychic will get a mashup of the three. One channel may dominate, and it may vary from day to day. For me, I tend to predominantly hear and feel my info, with seeing images close behind. Like your fingerprint, your intuitive style is completely unique. And its fun to figure it out!
The experience of “getting” information often trips people up because they think they’re just “imagining” it. Here’s the thing – your imagination is the vehicle. It has to be – that’s how we process things in our lives.
Think about what you have to do after work. You’re probably seeing yourself running to the grocery store, picking up the kids after soccer and making dinner. That information shows up in your imagination, like images on a screen. And it’s the same way with psychic stuff.
The trick is to learn how to distinguish between the kind of imagination that has you seeing yourself in a hot air balloon with George Clooney (OK, that’s just me) – and the kind where you’re seeing a new job opportunity. That just comes with practice.
Before I share some fun exercises, let’s talk keeping yourself sane and healthy. Any kind of psychic work involves energy. It’s important to take some care before you dive in. Why? Well, think about one of those people – and you KNOW you know one – who just drains you. They have a talent for sucking you dry with their problems. After a night out, listening to their story (again), they say something like, “Wow – it was so great to see you. I feel soooo much better!” You, on the other hand, feel like you got hit in the face with a bat.
So energy is a real thing, and you need to know how to work with it. Before I do anything related to spiritual work, I envision an “egg” of protective white light around my whole body. This is something I learned years ago; it takes about 2 seconds and serves as a shield from whatever, good and bad. It keeps me from becoming completely knackered after a reading (PS — it’s a good thing to do when you’re about to meet that Energy Vampire for drinks. You’ll thank me in the morning).
If your ability to “see” this white light isn’t so hot, you can just say something like, “I surround myself with the white light of love and protection.” That’ll work, too.
So make it a point to do this super-quick ritual before practicing anything to do with your psychic side. It’s not a bad addition to your daily life in general — keeping a lot of random crap from sticking to you.
Now, let’s dive in.
NAME THAT HEADLINE
I first started teaching this little exercise back when old school newspapers were still big. Even if you get your daily news fix from an online site, it’ll still work.
Here’s what you do: start by putting yourself in that handy egg of white light. Then…
1) Set a notebook and pen aside to record what you get. Close your eyes, relax and take a few deep breaths.
2) Envision a blank movie screen or piece of paper in front of you. Keep breathing.
3) Now ask the Universe to send you a hint of tomorrow’s news. It may come as an image, a word, a feeling. Stay relaxed and let it unfold. Go with the first thing you get. I can’t stress this enough; oftentimes, our first impression is the RIGHT one. But we talk ourselves out of it.
4) As this is happening, stay gently engaged and observe how you’re getting the info: are you seeing it, feeling it, hearing it?
5) After a few minutes (really, keep this short so you don’t get too anxious), take a few more breaths and return to the “here and now.” Jot down what you got. Check it tomorrow and see how you did.
You may need to do this a few times before you get a “hit.” But it’s fun!
For this, you’ll need something like a piece of jewelry, from someone you don’t know the backstory on all that well. Maybe ask a friend to bring you their mother-in-law’s earring (yes, you’ll give it back. Unless its really nice….). You can try it on anything where you can get some confirmation afterwards.
Once more, put yourself in that white-light-egg thingy. Then…
1) Set a notebook and pen aside to record what you get. Close your eyes, relax and take a few deep breaths.
2) Hold the object in your non-dominant hand (meaning, the one you don’t write with). That allows you to tap more easily into the subconscious. Relax and keep breathing.
3) What information is coming off the object? It may come as an image, a word, a feeling. Stay relaxed and let it unfold. Go with the first thing you get. And, this is important, tell your friend what you’re getting (so they can verify). Don’t try to understand it. Just say what you’re getting. This may take some time, since we tend to want to be “right.” Learning to just flow with the information is one of the hardest parts of psychic development.
4) Again, stay gently engaged and observe how you’re getting the info: are you seeing it, feeling it, hearing it? Does one dominate more than the others?
5) After a few minutes, take a few more breaths and return to the “here and now.”
As your friend tells you what was a “hit,” recall how you got that piece of info. Seeing, hearing, feeling….The more you do this, the more clearly defined will be that line between your everyday imagination and the particular way your psychic info comes in.
These are two simple exercises that train your psychic muscle, but you can work it all day long: as in, “who’s calling?” (don’t cheat and look at your phone). Is a particular person going to reach out to you today? What song will come up next on the radio? You could sit with a deck of cards while you watch Real Housewives and try to guess their color, suit or number as you pull each from the deck. The idea is to let the part of you that doesn’t work off intellect to be in the driver’s seat more often.
And the one thing I can’t emphasize enough? Follow your gut. When something comes up in your life that you’re not sure of, what does your gut tell you?
Paying attention — and acting on the feelings your gut inspires — is the easiest way to tune up your psychic muscle. I’ve heard that “intuition is wisdom in reverse.” So start working that channel and save yourself a lot of grief. You’ll thank me (and I love gift cards to Target!).
So what times did your intuition tell you something? Spill it in the comments section!
Not long ago, I had a woman come in for a reading. Well-dressed, educated, well-spoken — and absolutely terrified. It seems that she’d been to another reader earlier in the week, and was told that she’d been “cursed.” She hemmed, hawed, tried to laugh it off, because, really, who believes in those things….
But as much as she struggled to brush it away, she was quietly freaked out. Then she handed me a small piece of amethyst crystal and told me that the reader had promised her that this stone would help start to dissolve the curse. Operative word, “start” — she’d need new ones to keep it going (of course). This little stone sold in our store for five bucks; that reader had charged her — wait for it — four hundred American dollars. And she’d paid it!
Well, I spent the better part of our session comforting her, telling her that there are no such things as curses, except to the extent we let someone else in our head. It’s a strong suggestion that we take to heart, and ultimately, make happen. A “curse” is the ultimate way of giving your power over to someone else. And sadly, there are some who know how to work it like a drag queen on the runway.
These unethical readers can be very good at conning people (its too damn bad they don’t put those dodgy people skills to a good use). They know how to zero in on your soft white underbelly. Four hundred dollars later, you’re wondering what happened and feeling like a world-class idiot.
Please don’t blame yourself. When you come for a reading, you’re at least a little bit vulnerable. There’s something going on in your life that you need help with. If someone’s going to take advantage of that, just know that there’s a special place in Hell reserved for them (its located next to that person who bores you to tears with pictures of their license-plate collecting hobby. Only here, you can never get away!)
My rule is this: it’s perfectly acceptable to pay a fee for a reading. You’re paying for the reader’s time, energy and talent. But once they start tacking on “extras” or giving you a sense that your life will totally derail without there special help, leave. One of the cardinal rules of the metaphysical world is that we all have free will; a reading should encourage you to use it to advance your life in a positive direction. Every esoteric system that I know of also emphasizes embracing one’s own power — so if someone is attempting to make you feel powerless, dependent, helpless, frightened, tell them to pound sand. They don’t have your best interest at heart, just your wallet.
If you’ve found yourself in this situation, don’t beat yourself up: take it as a reminder from the Universe to embrace your own power and not give it over to a psychic. Or anyone, for that matter (as in crappy bosses, loudmouthed partners or your bitchy mother).
As for that store-front swindler that freaked out so many of my clients, well, she suddenly moved on. I hear the cops shut her down (ya think?); unfortunately for her — and anyone like her — the Universal Cop will also come calling at some point, as well. And no 400-dollar crystal will help them.
Almost every time I have a client sitting across from me, they tell me that they want to hear more often from their loved ones on the other side. A medium can be useful in this regard: it’s sort of like being an iPhone for reaching across the dimensions. But those who’ve passed are always letting us know they’re around in less technical ways. We just need to pay attention –and then acknowledge it.
Many times, we’ll have an experience that makes us go, “Hmmmm” — and somehow, you just KNOW that it was from the other side. There’s something a little different, out of the ordinary — but here’s what happens: we talk ourselves out of it. We dismiss it as a coincidence, or imagination, or a hundred other things. And thus, another wonderful tickle from our loved one goes unacknowledged.
In the movies, people have big, dramatic moments where they connect with the Other Side. I wish it were like that in real life, but its not. In my experience, the deceased tend to whisper, not shout. I think it’s also a function of our own “radar” being a little clogged with reality TV, work stuff, text messages and other junk.
One way to tune that radar is to simply recognize when you DO get one of those little hinkys.
Right after my mother passed, I was upstairs in my loft, when I heard some things drop to the floor of my kitchen below. I just “knew” that it wasn’t random — it was my mother letting me know she was there. A week later, I had another experience of her presence, and I believe it was because I was a little more open to that energy.
Signs of your loved ones come in little ways: you may hear a song that makes you think of them. You may “hear” their voice in your head or smell their cigarette smoke. Finding pennies is another way spirit shows up, or you may have a dream about them. You may simply feel that they’re with you, especially at special occasions like births, weddings or graduations. With pets, you may think you hear them around their favorite spots, or feel them sleeping on the bed with you.
The most important thing you can do is to acknowledge and thank them for reaching out. When you do that, you grease the channel and allow for even more communication. Don’t blow it off or think you’re imagining it: that’s like turning the ringer off on your phone, and forgetting to turn it back on.
I love the fact that our loved ones are still with us. While it would be great to hug them for real, I’ll take finding a penny, or smelling my dad’s pipe or hearing my mother’s favorite classical piece when I turn on the car radio. It’s a decent substitute.