Tag: making changes

How Your Future Shows Up

No Comments

So I’m laying out the cards, and I see a change coming.  A new job, new lover, a shift in living situation.  Something awesome and positive.  But then the client leans across the table and starts reciting how they expect their new lover, new job, new fill-in-the-blank to appear.

“Well, I know someone who knows someone like that, and we met at a party last year, so I think its him….” [ It’s not].

“So OK,  my boss is talking about retiring which will make a space for me to move up, so then Sheila will probably go to Accounts Payable and then.….” [Wrong again].

I get it.  We all want a super-clear path to our future, one with no pholes, stoplights or tacky tourist traps.

Like this.
Like this.

I’m happy to oblige as best I can, but most of the times when I read, I see the destination with a fuzzy glow around it.  This is a reminder that the details of how something will manifest have yet to be fully determined.

And the more we cling to our own version of the details, the more we narrow the path to getting there and block out some pretty kickass options.

Years ago, my friend and I were first learning about Creative Visualization.  One of the key tenets is to get very detailed about what you want.   She wanted a new boyfriend, so she wrote down everything – and I mean everything – that she desired.  Four pages worth.  Back and front.

It was a little like this.
It was a little like this.

I’m all for having a clear vision – but too many details or expectations can drag it down.

To me, drilling down to the core of what you want simplifies that process.  And to get to that essence, think about how you want to feel with that thing/goal/person in your life.

Feelings are like lighter fluid to a dream.

Get cookin' on your dream -- and make it well-done.
Get cookin’ on your dream — and make it well-done.

Experiencing the emotion of a goal provides a potent, simple beacon that helps the Universe bring it your way. Conversely, trying to maintain a million details in your head only mucks up the works.  It’s like herding cats.

My girlfriend could have made her man-hunting job way easier by thinking about how she wanted to feel in that new relationship: safe, loved, appreciated for her wicked sense of humor.  Maybe the brown hair, build like Jean Claude Van Damme and penchant for collecting African art wouldn’t be so important if she got the emotional outcome that she wanted.

My philosophy is, you don’t have to do all the heavy lifting alone; keep the simple essence in mind, gently hold onto the feeling and let the Universe meet you halfway.  Let it surprise you.

th

This requires letting go of the handlebars.   Remember how scary that felt?  But when you did, and the bike flew along on its own, it was a total rush.  And you got where you were going having had a whole lot more fun.

Got questions of your own?  Hit me up at the website.

th

Never Too Late: How to Fix the (Seemingly) Unfixable

No Comments

There’s a house up the street that’s stood vacant for the last 25 years.  I’m told that, on his deathbed, the owner made his wife swear she’d never sell it.  She didn’t.  Instead, she moved to Georgia with her daughter, leaving the house to rot.  The weeds grew up, raccoons were spotted inside.   My neighbors and I complained, and every so often, someone would show up to cut the grass.  But it was a sad little sight, and I figured that one day, the house would just be leveled.

Yeah, it looked kinda like this.  A hot mess.
Yeah, it looked kinda like this. A hot mess.

Last week, some trucks showed up.  They began cutting away the overgrown shrubs.  The roof was repaired, the shingles scrubbed.  I can see painters working away inside.  This poor little house that everyone had given up on is getting a second chance.  It makes me smile.

This Extreme Makeover is a reminder that its never too late for any of us to make some changes.  I have so many clients who feel that the ship has sailed, that their situation — whether its a job they hate or a relationship that’s dead — is a done deal.   Not true.  Maybe our brains have gotten used to covering the same tired tracks, but that’s essentially the only thing holding us back: the way we think about the situation.

I love this particular card:

th-1

The Hanged Man looks pretty pathetic; he seems trapped, but look again:  by hanging upside down, he can see his situation from a different perspective.  That’s why there’s that “glow” around his head — its an “aha” moment that comes from flipping something on its head.  Literally.

Everyone on our street had gotten it into our collective heads that no one would buy that broken down property. But someone else thought differently.  They saw possibility and began taking the steps to turn things around.  Each day, they come closer to realizing that vision.

What part of your life needs a makeover?  Now don’t go to that default impulse that you can’t change it:  take another look.  Then start clearing out the weeds.  If that raccoon camp up the street can be turned back into a home, anything is possible!

Cut down some weeds and see your situation differently.  Get to it!
Cut down some weeds and see your situation differently. Get to it!