I’ve recently been revisiting that book, The Secret.  It’s not quite as trendy as it was about 5 years back, but its discussion of the Law of Attraction is as relevant as ever.

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The book’s thesis – that thoughts are magnetic –feels right to me, and is being backed up by science.  Focusing your mental and emotional energy on a particular goal helps align it with the creation energy all around us.

Buutttt….how do you focus all that awesome energy when you don’t really know what you want?  Or your “wish list” changes from week to week?  Let me tell ya, as a kid, writing my list out for Santa was a bitch.

"Wait, I also want a Barbie...and, oh, wait, maybe not that, but...."
“Wait, I also want a Barbie…and, oh, wait, maybe not that, but….”

Needless to say, when your goals change as much as Madonna’s face, the Law of Attraction is just busy trying to keep track.

Yeah, I went there.
Yeah, I went there.

So here’s an awesome exercise I learned from Miss Oprah:

1)  Pick an area of your life you’d like to change:  your body, your lovelife, your work,  Whatever.

2) Take a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle.  On the one side write “What I Never Want Again.”  On the other, “What I Do Want.”

3) Now think about your goal.  Let’s say it’s a better love life.  Think about your last (or current) partner.  What about that relationship really, really bugs/bugged you? Go for the first things that come to mind:  the fact that he/she drank more than Snooki?  The way they clammed up whenever you really needed to share your feelings?  The back that had more hair  on it than a Yeti?

"I never want a girlfriend who maintains a blood-alcohol level of 3.0."
“I never want a girlfriend who maintains a blood-alcohol level of 3.0.”

Don’t drill down into every pesky little annoyance; stick to broad strokes to begin with.  Write them down on the one side of your list.

4) OK, so the things that you NEVER want to experience again?  The exact opposite is what you DO want.  Example: “I never want someone who drinks ‘til they puke” leads to “I want a partner who’s sober or only drinks a little.” Example: “I never want someone who ignores me when I need a hug” becomes “I want someone who is affectionate and attentive.”

This is a really fascinating exercise.  I find that it really helps you zero in on the core essence of what you want.  Its kinda like a dose of Ritalin for a jumpy brain.

And it will help the Law of Attraction know where to find you.

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