I did a bunch of readings recently with clients who were really Going Thru Some Things. One of the comments that kept coming up involved being “punished”; they felt the reason for their troubles was that they’d been “bad” somehow (they hadn’t).
Look, Human Life is hard. I believe that we choose to incarnate as a way to learn both individually, and through our interactions with others. Making that choice is badass. We could stay “up there,” but we opt to grow and get better, for the benefit of our own souls and those around us. And so, we pack our little ditty bag and beam down, taking on those challenges and life circumstances that will increase our wisdom.
And I’m the first to admit, it can SUCK. I read all kinds of people with all kinds of problems, and I’m always impressed by what they’ve agreed to take on.
As I mentioned at the top, though, a lot of us think our bad luck is “punishment” for something. The Universe is not judgmental in the way we think of it. Our manmade religious institutions are judgmental, our friends and family are conditioned to be judgmental. Even our financial system has the judgemental subtext that rich people must be “good” to have wealth and those less better off are moral failures. The idea of suffering as punishment is baked into our human institutions.
Hooey. And what’s really hurtful about adding layers of judgment to an already difficult situation is that it doesn’t help in one single way. In fact, it complicates the problem by surrounding it with tall, thick emotional grass that you’ve gotta cut through before even getting to the situation at hand.
What I’m talking about here is not the same as “karma.” Karma is about the Universe balancing out the consequences of our actions. Again, it’s not punitive, it’s just about spiritual order. What I’m stressing is the uselessness of emphasizing manmade concepts about your character as the reason for what’s happening in your life.
This is not to minimize difficult circumstances. Not at all. I’m just here to tell you that the Forces That Be haven’t placed them in your path to be bitchy or mean; they’re part of what you signed up for back on the Other Side. So give yourself some credit for being willing to step up. Then…work the problem. Focus on what you need to do that will help move the needle, even a little bit.
Think of airline pilots, soldiers under fire, someone operating nuclear equipment: when a problem arises, they get right on it. They have to. This very intense clip from the Denzel Washington movie, Flight, kinda makes my point. Everyone is panicking (I’d be one of them), he stays focused.
When dealing with the Life Stuff weighing you down, become a Steely-eyed Missile Man/Woman and discard thoughts of having “done something wrong” to cause it. Of course, we have free will and some of our actions and choices can contribute to a problem; those you’ll need to review at some point. This isn’t meant to give you a pass for something like driving buzzed and causing an accident; but again, don’t get caught up in the “good” or “bad” of those actions; remove the judgment and emotion, and work to fix the problem.
Wasting time bemoaning that you’re being “punished” is a lousy use of your time, energy, and power.
PS –If you’d like some help getting to the nub of a complicated problem and some smart ways to navigate it, reach out and let me help you find some answers.